If You Are Trying To Control Another Person, You Need To Control Yourself.

It is your insecurity speaking.


After making people in the state as the controller desired, the controller may temporarily feel better than their previous state. However, the people may harbor resentment towards the controller.

Manipulative Tendencies

However, the controller may or may not know about the cause of the need for control. This need is an indication of the imbalanced mental, physical, and emotional state.

Survival Instinct

The need to be in control is a natural survival instinct. Without a sense of security from control, fear can easily take over. Thus, leading to the need to fight and gain control.

What To Do

If you realized that you have been the controller, you may want to:

  • Take a few breaths before reacting during situations. It is to stop your habitual reaction and think before acting.
  • Consult a therapist. It can be hurting you and the others if unresolved.
  • Keep personal information to yourself. Oversharing allows the controller to use your information to control you.
  • Avoid or minimize interactions with the controller. Reduce the amount of time spent with the controller can put you in clarity to make clear decisions.
  • Remove yourself from arguments with the controller. There is no need to argue with a controller as the controller will keep twisting words to suit the agenda.
  • Consult professional advice. If it becomes abusive, it is important to seek external help to put yourself out of danger.

Final Message

Often, the external requires much effort from us to make changes to it. If we continuously work on controlling every minor detail around us, it can drain us in many undesirable ways. At the same time, there may not even be a need to.



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