Why Do I Write Or Type? (When I can be playing games or watching movies)
It all started when I decided to express my authenticity.
When I was a single-digit of age, I was made to write a diary every day. But, I was barely able to write much besides the same routine things that I do. However, I believed the purpose of it wasn’t just to cultivate discipline, but, to practice my handwriting too.
As years passed, this practice is being dissolved into the passage of time. And, it was picked up once more during the growing trend of internet blogging. It’s also during the period where I had the most difficulty expressing myself due to social anxiety and overthinking. It felt awesome to have a place to channel my frustrations and insecurities on.
Incidentally, it stopped once again when I left my friends and embarked on another stage of my life. Writing has never been my mind afterward as I was into technical works instead of expressions and communications. Interestingly, I was being drawn back to writing this time for various reasons.
Questions like ”What do I want to do?”, ”What’s my purpose in life?”, etc, started surfacing in my mind again upon reaching another crossroad in my life. Once my once thought trustworthy friends or/and business partners weren’t as I thought, it was a realization that it was a time to move on my own.
And so, I decided to continue onto another project that I had been considering. At the same time, it was the start of the pandemic where everyone had to stay at home. The timing most probably couldn’t be more perfect for me to start working on my idea which requires me to write.
Although writing can be in various forms, no matter what, mine has to come from a place of authenticity. This is due to the aim of the project. As the aim of the project is to deliver new original perspectives to the masses to broaden the mass’s point of view to raise the consciousness as a whole, it will be quite pointless in copying and pasting any other people’s ideas. Hence, I have to truthful.
To be truthful, I have to understand who I am and what I desire. However, there is confusion between knowing and not knowing. The confusion occurrence is similar to situations where I may know what I am doing, but, I may not know what I am doing it for. In other words, I may think that I must strive to have material possession to be happy even though being happy is a feeling that I can evoke if I just focus upon a happy experience. Simply put, what I think I know may be disproved when I discover something that I don’t know about that opens new possibilities.
Therefore, writing isn’t just about providing ideas, but, also to sort out between what I know and what I don’t know. As such, I can gain insight and clarity in my understanding of my knowledge while being able to communicate my ideas with clarity and authenticity. In this killing-two-birds-with-one-stone method, the efficiency of work towards my goals improved as when I gain much clarity, my communication improves as well which propels me towards my goals by simply focusing on a single craft.
Also, I used to face many issues in regards to expressing myself to others during conversations as I was often over-thinking about how others may feel about what I would say. As a result, it wasn’t the best experience where I could get understood or, at least, not end in awkward situations. Nevertheless, the experiences fueled my drive to become comfortable at self-expression regardless of how I will be perceived and writing is one of the ways to do so.
All in all, for me, writing is all about self-expression, personal growth, and sharing ideas with the world. In my belief, the world functions as a whole. Hence, when I grow, the world will benefit from me; when the world benefits, I will benefit as well. In simple words, I write because I believe that I can benefit not just myself, but, also the entire world.
